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Monthly Dear Period Story

Dear Period,

Just wanted to let you know you suck!

Love,

Anonymous

 

Dear Anonymous,

Oh to the contrary my dear - I am amazing, a powerful crimson tide. Strong and beautiful.

So what's got you so worked up? A few panties ruined? Cramps? Back ache? Please, that's nothing in comparison to what I do for you each month - delicately balancing your hormones, I'm a fined tuned wonder. So slow down with the slander, I don't suck. And if you continue to think that I suck, well let's just say I don't think making me angry is a good idea.

Your pal,
Period


 

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 A few choice stories from the Story Series

DP #0016

Dear Period,

8th grade graduation party, we were all outside celebrating and C.W. and I decided to climb the fence of the neighboring park district pool, and jump in fully clothed. The entire class promptly followed us. While sitting in a room waiting for our punishment I got my period in soaking wet white shorts.

Still Embarrassed.

Dear Still Embarrassed,

I think you should be grateful.  This is a life lesson ... don't wear white shorts. Everyone who wears white shorts should be punished.

Your Period Fashionista

 

DP #0007

Dear Period,

Thank you for making me the woman I am today.  I hate you.  I appreciate the bigger boobs.  Eat that sandwich!

T. A.

Dear T.A.,

You are oh so welcome for the bigger boobs shuga.  Here to help monthly until the day I die.

Ha, ha, ha

Period

DP #0003

Dear Period,

That post stress that you are providing the last two nights that consist of sweating in bed while my mind debates "hmmm maybe I should've worn a pad" or better yet "maybe it isn't over" is simply just wrong.  Maybe I should follow in the footsteps of a new leader and just deny?

Cleavage and elbow sweat

Anonymous

 

Dear Anonymous,

As in all long term relationships, you should realize that stress is part of the game.  However, I never thought you would be so low as to compare the dynamics of our relationship to the new president.  That's just dirty...I may retaliate next month, just sayin'

Love,

Period